just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
