She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
