I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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