note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize