I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
