This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize