I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
my sisters under your porch take her home
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Randomize
