guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
