I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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