shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
