To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
