In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
there is glitter all over my balls
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
