Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
