What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
