im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
