so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
