You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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