he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
