im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
