Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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