If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
The power of my boobs compel you
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Randomize
