and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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