Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
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