Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
