So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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