He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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