I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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