I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
