the day after is always just damage control
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
