the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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