I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
