Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I cut my penus on the lid.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
