covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
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