Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
