He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
