there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
handjob tips. give me some.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
