she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
