he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
