yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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