I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
