My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm like, not good at living.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
