I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
