As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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