dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
my poor anus
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize