Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
