how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
