So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Randomize
