You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
