seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
My vagina is very pro this idea
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
