awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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