Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
